Ok, so it’s that time of year, quite a few of us will have started the next year up in school or started college in an entirely different place, the challenges this poses are great, and they can really make you nervous about going into classes, which really isn’t good considering you are going to spend the next two, or maybe even more, years of your life there.

So on your first day you get the butterflies in your stomach, thoughts wiz around your mind like, “what if I don’t make friends?”, or “what if I can’t even find my way around this place?”. There’s that ominous look about your new college on the first day, you see it more as a place full of unknown than a great new future, you view the lessons as dreaded hours in which you will spend time with people who are unknown to you, the age old questions go through your head “will they like me?”, “am I their type?” and “what if I don’t fit in?”.

Well most of us our now a month into the “torture” and were starting to realise college isn’t that bad at all!! We might have got a few dreaded illness’ from being run into the ground with lack of sleep and excessive work load, we may have done a few things we regret due to drunkenness. But overall were starting to think “hey college isn’t such a bad place!”. You may have made a few new friends who you spend time discussing the issues brought with college, which are normally, boys, booze, clothes, money (or lack of it) and your never ending supply of cheap boil in 2 minute noodles. You have started you college experience and your loving it.

For some though, one month in college is still looking bleak, they haven’t made all that many friends, they haven’t had the amazing nights out and their experience has still not begun, or not the good part of it anyway. Well for these people I have rounded up some advice! I asked people what they saw in the people they made friends with, why they were drawn to them and not others, to which I got a mix of answers but a few points stood out in amongst the rest. Firstly they chose people who had a look of confidence about them, people who looked able to hold a good conversation. Secondly, people who were like them but different, a confusing statement I know! They said that when they look for new people to associate with they were looking for people who had signs of being interested in the same thing, making it easier for them to start a conversation, but they weren’t looking for exact clones of themselves. Thirdly, they were looking for someone happy, a smile on their face and like they had no cares in the world... this can be difficult considering we all have difficulties living in the world we do, but just pretend! Stick on that smile throw your shoulders back, walk proud and people will be drawn to you! Let people know your easy to talk to and give them a starting point, maybe wear a badge with a band on it, so that if a person approaches you they can start a conversation to do with the band. Even if you lack confidence the best way to attract people is to start a conversation and show them you’re a good person who they can chat to easily. Even if you feel this is impossible, as I once did the key is positive thinking. You have to say to yourself, ”what’s the worst that could happen?” they could blank you, in which case, “who cares?” should be your next thought, they obviously aren’t right for you. If you think of a simple conversation starter, choose a person who looks like your kind of person and go over and just say hi, and then use your conversation starter, chances are they’ll chat back! Don’t be afraid to jump in feet first, if they are chatting back and you feel comfortable with them, ask them if they want to go out for a drink, them and their friends, and if they say yes, then your sorted! If they say no, don’t worry, there’s plenty more people out there!

The key to making friends in the college environment is confidence, whether it’s real or not, positive thoughts about yourself and others, and a good starting point. Negative thoughts can only lead to negative results.

For those people who are already loving their college experience and have their friends sorted, maybe you could just keep your eye out and be aware that not everyone has had as much luck as you. You could make someone’s college life so much better by just saying hi and inviting them out. It’s not a huge thing to do and you could get a truly amazing friend out of it, because it’s normally the quite ones that surprise you, in a good way!

College is one of the best times a person can have, you have the opportunity to make friends, gain independence, learn skills needed for life, enjoy association with some of the wackiest people you’ll ever meet all day and way into the night and it’ll be something you look back on fondly all your life. Even if college isn’t looking all that great now, give it time and think positive, it’ll come together and you won’t regret your decision to go.