10 Ways to Jumpstart Your Sex Life
Posted by Bridget Fox on September 10, 2012 at 8:57 PM
Repetition is great—if you're learning to cook or teaching an old dog new tricks. But let’s face it ladies, it's death for your sex life, turning the pursuit of happiness into a lackluster and frankly, boring experience. After going through one such dry spell myself, my boyfriend and I did some research (which wasn’t at all awkward, let me tell you) and then set out testing that research. Some things worked…some things definitely didn’t. Here are 10 simple strategies we put to the test that will turn your old flame into a “towering inferno.”
1. Don't Start in the Bedroom
Going at it in the same old place all the time makes it too easy to fall into the same old patterns. Explore some new areas to get down and dirty: The kitchen. The bathroom. Quebec City. Your bodies will be in new places, making it unlikely that you'll follow old routines.
2. Go Canoeing or Hiking
Or any sort of outdoor/dangerous activity you like. If you want to get all sciency about it, adding a touch of danger to the day will stimulate dopamine in your brain, triggering your sex drive. Essentially, your hormones will do the work for you. You'll see your guy as the cause of the excitement, as well as the source of security. Just think about seeing your boyfriend doing all sort of manly things…yeah, you know it works.
3. Try Some Black Licorice
Bring it along when you're watching a Clooney flick. Again the science: Black licorice has been shown to speed up your genital bloodflow by 40 percent, says Ava Cadell, Ph.D., a sex therapist and the author of Love Around the House. My two cents? Eh, maybe? But I’m not a huge licorice fan so that tingle might have just been indigestion…
4. Explore New Regions
So I’m sure by this stage in your life, you are well aware of the areas on your body that get the most attention. And for good reason right? They feel good. He knows they feel good. Good. Now kindly asking him to spend some time on the back of your neck. It's a brave new world of nerve endings. You’re welcome.
5. Ditch Your Drawers During Dinner
Yup, go commando, ladies! The naked secret you now share will linger through dessert. Feels good to be a little bad, doesn’t it!
6. Talk Dirty in Public
Lie on a blanket in a park, with people all around, and whisper your fantasies to one another, sparing absolutely no detail. You'll create sexual tension, but there's safety because there's no possibility of sex then and there.
7. Kiss for 12 Seconds
A long, lingering smooch reintroduces you to each other. Give him two a day: one in the morning and one as soon as you're home. Mouths open, arms around each other. Kiss like that for the rest of your lives and passion will never fade, I promise.
8. Use a Prop
Nothing jumpstarts you like oral sex, so put one pillow under your hips and another under his chest. It's easier for you to then adjust your knees and legs, aka, more comfort and no cramping. Wanna make it feel even better? Have your guy rest his chin on his fist, and use a finger to put pressure on the bottom of your vagina to heighten the sensation.
9. Talk Big About the Future
You know your dreams—children, a beach house, season tickets to your fave NFL team—so talk about how you want to make that happen. You're touching a primal desire and emphasizing your long-term commitment. Nothing is sexier than a man who isn’t afraid to talk about the future.
10. Go Ahead and Stare
You know how sexy you feel when your guy compliments you? It works for him too. So lavish praise on the lilies and you'll be invited back to the garden or whatever that saying is. Concentrate on a favorite body part and talk about how hot he is. Make him feel sexy by thinking and saying he’s sexy. He’ll reciprocate and you’ll both be hot for each other.
How do you bring back the spark?