How To Say You're Sorry
Posted by Girls Guide To on July 11, 2012 at 9:22 PM
We have all made mistakes, and sometimes they affect others we care about. I’m notoriously bad at cracking jokes that end up falling flat, and sometimes offending someone. Whether you’ve put your foot in your mouth or just made a genuine mistake, the best way to move on is to simply apologize. It’s not always easy, so here are 7 tips to remember when you’re in the wrong.
An apology doesn’t count if you’re not sincere, and a major part of sincerity is accepting responsibility for your actions. You can explain yourself, but don’t expect the person to accept your justifications. You need to recognize that what you did hurt someone you care about, and accept that responsibility, without trying to excuse it.
Agree to Disagree
Part of apologizing isn’t making the offended person understand why you did something. More than likely, they won’t see your side, and you may not really get their point either. In this situation, you just need to agree to disagree, and then move on.
Write it Out
Saying “I’m sorry” is difficult for many people, and if you’re one of them, consider writing out the apology. If you’re sincere, a handwritten note is an acceptable form of apology. Or just use your notes as a “script” of sorts when talking to the other person. This way, you’ll remember the exact points you wanted to make even if you get flustered.
Make A Kind Gesture
It’s hard to say sorry, and if you’re really struggling to convey just how sorry you are in words, then a kind gesture can help. When I’ve had a small argument with my boyfriend, I’ll try to pick up a favorite treat of his, but just giving the person a hug or squeeze can convey your apologies too.
If You Must, Phone It In
Just like writing a letter, making a phone call isn’t as strong of an apology, but it is a step in the right direction. Getting out that first apology over the phone will make it easier to discuss the problem in person. Just make sure it’s a phone call and not a text.
Don’t Let Pride Get in the Way
If you really care about someone, don’t let pride get in the way. It might make you feel weak to apologize, but swallowing your pride is necessary if it will save your friendship.
You Don’t Have to Beg
An apology doesn’t equate begging for forgiveness. If you make a sincere apology, understand the person you hurt may still need time to recover. Don’t force or beg them to accept the apology at that exact moment, instead give them some space and time to think things over. If the person expects you to beg, then there is a bigger problem with your relationship.
Do you have any advice on apologizing? Share your experience in the comments below.