What Men Really Want in the Bedroom

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Posted by Girls Guide To on March 23, 2012 at 11:53 AM

Thanks to a new survey from Esquire, we now have a glimpse into the secret sex lives of the men in our lives. Men apparently think about sex 19 times a day -- or about once every hour and a half -- but what do men’s sex lives look like in the real world? That’s exactly what Esquire tried to decode in its “Sex and the American Man” survey.

The magazine randomly selected 522 men across the country of all ages, marital statuses, sexual identities and ethnic backgrounds to participate. Esquire asked these men about their most intimate desires and bedroom habits, as well as their beliefs about monogamy, sexual identity and porn. And while some of the results were less than surprising -- a lot of men wouldn't mind sleeping with Mila Kunis! -- others were pretty unexpected. We picked 11 of the most interesting findings below -- for more, see the full survey results in the April issue of Esquire.

Married Men Are Happier With Their Sex Lives Than Singles

Shocking right? Sixty-six percent of married men reported being satisfied with their sexy times, while only 47 percent of single men did. While this defies the "sexless marriage" stereotype, these stats also could be a byproduct of the frustrating experiences that tend to accompany casual dating.

Men's "Little Black Books" Are Emptier Than You Think

When asked about how many sexual partners they'd had in their lifetime, 62 percent of men said that they had been with 10 or fewer sexual partners. However, lots of men still do play the field -- 22 percent reported having 20 or more past conquests.

What Men Want To Do To You Changes With Age

Men in their 20s were almost twice as likely to want to spend more time stimulating the girls than men in their 40s were. On the flip side, 29 percent of older men reported wishing they could perform oral sex on their partners more often, while only 18 percent of men in their 20s said the same. Something to look forward to?

The #1 Thing Men Want More Of In Bed Is ...

Forty-three percent of men told Esquire that they wanted more oral sex from their partners.

They Aren’t Watching As Much Porn As You Might Think

Contrary to popular belief, men don’t need to clear their browsing history as much as we thought. Only 24 percent said that they watch at least once a day. Twenty-seven percent watch once a week, 20 percent said they almost never watch, and 17 percent claimed to never watch it. And most of those who admitted watching said they prefer watching a man and a woman having sex. Only 13 percent want to see two women together – another stereotype debunked.

They Like Technology

A sizeable portion of the men surveyed (21 percent) said that they had shot some sort of footage of themselves having sex -- though only 9 percent said that they still had that footage. (In the Internet age, it's probably safest to hit delete.) But men seem to be less cautious when it comes to photos. Twenty-six percent of men said that they'd emailed or texted sexually suggestive images to someone.

Give ‘Em a Break

Most of the men surveyed reported that they needed to take at least a little break between each round of sex. Forty percent said that they need an hour before getting going again.

Most Men Aren't Having Sex All That Often

The majority of men said that they generally had sex three times a week or less. Thirty-two percent said that they got it on one to three times a week, while 33 percent reported having sex less than once a week.

Most Men Aren't Jumping Into Bed With Just Anyone and Everyone

Although men and women both have one-night-stands on occasion, most men said that the majority of their sexual encounters are with people that they know at least moderately well. Twenty-seven percent said that they had known their most recent sexual partner for a few weeks, 28 percent said a few months and 21 percent said a few years.

(Some) Men Cheat

Of the men who were in committed relationships, 34 percent said that they'd had at least one other sexual partner since the relationship began. I don’t know about you, but that seems like a lot! Understandably, most men judge cheating on a case-by-case basis, with almost half saying that they were unsure how they'd judge a friend who cheated on his wife because "marriage is complicated."

But Most Men Believe In Monogamy

Though some men who hadn't cheated said that it would be "conceivable" that they would cheat on a partner they were committed to in the future, many men said they wouldn't dream of it. Fifty-eight percent of men told Esquire that they "believe strongly in lifelong monogamy." There’s hope! 

What do you think about the survey results? Does anything surprise you?


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