Question
Well, I lost my virginity when I was 13. I was actually raped I had not told anyone and it came up as we were talking last year with my older sister. She had promised she would not tell anyone! About a week ago she had caught me smoking and as an older sister would do she called my parents and told them all about it :/ and the next day she called my mom and said I am coming over (because she doesn't live with us anymore) and my mom came in to my room and asked me if there is anything she would like to hear from me because my sister was coming with something to tell her...Lets make a long story short she came and told both my parents and I snapped when they asked me if its true and told her to f*** off and that she is no longer my sister and that she is a backstabbing b***h. Do u think I was right? Would u forgive her?
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Um, absolutely not. Being raped is not something you should keep to yourself if you want to heal. And smoking, regardless of if it was a cigarette or drugs, is not a good idea.Your sister, whatever the outcome, sounds like she was doing what was in your best interest.
you will thank your sister one day. you may not see it now but trust me you should be glad to have someone like that in your life.
You were wrong to keep that a secret. You should have told someone right when it happened and had the person pay for what they did. Strong emotions like that shouldn't be bottled up. You tried to suppress it in yourself,but you shouldn't complain because your sister had strong concern and love for you she couldn't keep it inside. She obviously needed help in trying to deal with the issue herself. I would not be able to suppress my anger and concern if it were my sister that was raped. Love your sister and know that she loves you.
What do you mean by 'wrong' to keep it a secret?
I would forgive her. She did what she did out of love for you. Somebody seriously hurt you. If anyone came near my sisters like that I would most definitely do all I can to help them. She probably thought that telling your parents was the best thing she could do! I mean, what would you do if you found out someone had done that to her?
However, you should explain to her exactly why you're so angry with her. Tell her how you feel, don't cut her out of your life! A sister is a powerful ally to have. You need to talk it over.
As for telling your parents about you smoking, that rather pales in comparison.
Quote: What do you mean by 'wrong' to keep it a secret?
Even if you don't go to the police or report the rape, its still something you need to talk about with a friend or your sister. Keeping tradgedy bottled up can only hurt. I'm not sure about telling your parents years later was going to help you though. Unless you've developed other problems as a result of it.
Quote: What do you mean by 'wrong' to keep it a secret?
Even if you don't go to the police or report the rape, its still something you need to talk about with a friend or your sister. Keeping tradgedy bottled up can only hurt. I'm not sure about telling your parents years later was going to help you though. Unless you've developed other problems as a result of it.
Unwanted sex is never cool, expecially if you are 13! It sounds like you have been through alot. I remember having unwanted sex when I had just turned 18, with a guy I would have never had sex with, sober! I was very torn between turning him into the cops, or just letting it go. I had my reasons! the guy was married to a good friend of mine, and they had two kids. she knew about the "rape" yet said nothing. I chose not to say anything, because I was hoping it was a one time incident of "stupidity". Well, it wasn't. a few years later, he had raped a 14 year old girl, and ended up in jail for a few years. I kick myself now, because I could have stopped that, but I was concerned for my alleged friend at the time, and her two children. (sigh!!!!) I found out later, that she was just really scared of him. (nice choice for a spouse,eh???) I remember the pain I went through at the time, and remeber the few years of drugs I did to kill the pain. I just wish I could have gone back and did things differently, such as contact the cops, and maybe seek a couselor for awhile instead. I don't know if it is the case with all victims, but I definately know that this action had a reaction. If this was indeed a rape, It is time to get help NOW rather than later. You certainly don't want to have to end up on a bad path, you know? good luck to you!
listen, I'd be pissed too. but she's your sister, and she was only doing what she thought was right for you. she loves you and just wants what is best for you. I know you're gonna absolutely hate her for a while, but you'll realize soon enough that she was just trying to help. as for the whole rape thing, I've never been even touched so I don't know what to tell you about that but I'm soo sorry. It must be horrible. :(
I'm confused. She told them about the rape because you were smoking? That's just odd....