so sorry to hear of your cousin passing, i have cousins i hardly see and talk to n wouldnt know what to do if i lost one of them. the thing u could do is just spend some time where she is burried or cremated and just talk as if she was here. that is what members of my family have done through the years. i hope that everything works out in the end. xxx

So sorry to hear about your loss. My dad passed away nearly 9 years ago, when I was 12. He was only 46, and his doctor had failed to spot his bad heart. It was very sudden, and he was working in Scotland at the time.
Whenever I have a bad time, I always find it helps to talk to him, whether in the house, at the grave, etc. It is hard at times, but whenever I think of giving up, I always imagine how he would feel if I did.
I have a very dear friend, who also lost a parent, and I find it always helps to talk to people in the same, or a similar situation. And don't be afraid to cry - it's all part of grieving.
Those we love never truly leave us, and just know that your cousin will be with you always watching over you.
I hope things work out for you, xxxx

When you say your family is going nuts... what d'you mean? As in you're all upset and none of you are coping very well? Or as in you're not dealing with it and your family don't know how to help? If it's the former, would it be worth you getting together with your family, and having a really good talk about how you're all feeling, and what she meant to you? Not in a formal way, just in a family get together to help each other out kind of way. You can talk about how you're all feeling, what she meant to you, the fun times you had, the stupid things she said that made you laugh. Don't focus on what you'll miss, focus on the fun you had, and the fun you're having remembering the fun you had! I know it's hard to cope when things don't go to plan, just remember- you're not alone. Shit happens, and all you can do is try to see the funny side (not that losing your cousin is funny, but I hope you understand what I mean).

Finally, don't feel you HAVE to get over it in a set time, it's hard on all of you, and you'll all cope differently I'm sure, so don't put pressure on anyone (yourself included!) to "just get over it". Doing this makes people think they are alone and in the wrong; so you won't talk, and you'll lose the advantage of having people to talk to that know how you feel... and then what will you do?

Good luck, I hope I might have helped a little- and smile, laugh, have fun, and know that your cousin would be joining in with it. If she were still with you she wouldn't hold it against you or feel offended that you're trying to be happy, and try to come to terms with something that's hard to deal with. My dad worried and got upset with himself when I was in hospital- because he could go somewhere will my sister and still have fun while I was bored in hospital, but I could never hold that against him- something happening to me doesn't mean his life has to be equally shit for the time being. She wouldn't hold it against you that you want to be happy again, so keep that in mind. If you start to feel bad, just know that she'd probably say you were being stupid and tell you to cheer up!

Good luck again, and I'm sorry this has happened to you, but use it to get closer to your family, and think of the good times you may have forgotten about in the upset. xxxxx

( and WOW sorry that was a lot.....xx)

My grandmother, who I was very close to, died a year ago last month. She was always in my thoughts and very close to my heart. She died very suddenly (within two weeks of finding out she had cancer). Like many others here have said, I found that just letting myself cry helped. I talked to her as if she were there (whether it was in my room, my dorm room, while i was going to sleep, silently while i was at work, etc) and talking to the people around me who were close to me. That seems to help.

I did the same thing when one of my best friends passed away a few months ago. After it happened I spent alot of time alone and I didn't realize it then but it really helped me. I had time to think about her and talk to her like she was there with me. That really helped me alot. But it is also good to let the people close to you help you when you need it. Even if you don't talk alot about it, its nice to know that people are there if you need them. I think if you can balance spending time alone and with others, that is the best way to deal with things like this.

Time alone and spending time with family ( even if they are in a panic) would help you and them. Music really helps too as does talking to friends

My dad passed away a couple of weeks ago very unexpectedly from a heart attack at the age of 54. What helps me is just talking a lot about my favorite memories with him and help this with me dealing with my own mortality. In some cases you could even try to focus on what could be learned from a death like this. Like I could honestly say that his death was directly related to illness cause by his many years of smoking. So now I feel like I should become more of an activist against smoking. Thinking in ways like these can help you but like I learned in these last couple of weeks, we all mourn differently.

I'm so sorry to hear about this- I lost a very dear friend back in February, so in order to get through a lot of my pain and grief, I made an eight-part video series about coping with grief and loss on YouTube. If you wanna watch these videos, maybe even just to not feel so alone, you can check them out here: http://www.youtube.com/user/prettysailorusagi#grid/all

try not to change anything in your daily routine. thats not to say you can't grieve and be upset, but i mean things like eating..
make sure you eat proper meals, i dont know about anyone else because i know some people may comfort eat, but whenever anything like this happens to me i stop eating and it drags everything else and makes it alot worse :)
thats just my advice ..
hope everything gets better xx

Just remember all the good times you had with your cousin. I recently lost a close family friend. I just had to be their for her daughters, so just be there for everyone in your family. Dont completely forget about your cousin, she would want you to be happy. So dont spend all your time being sad about your she would want you to continue happily with your life but dont forget about her.

Sorry to hear about your loss, losing someone you love is never easy.. I lost my Dad when I was 20 months old. The best thing you can do is just let yourself grieve.. and unfortunately no-one can tell you how to do that, it's something that's individual to each and every person. Sometimes when it gets too much for me, I'll take my dog out in the fields (i live in the country) and it's really quiet, and i can scream and shout as much as I like and it lets a lot of it out. Crying is the best thing, just every now and then, there's nothing wrong with having a great big cry and letting everything out. I talk to my Dad aswell, not necessarily how much I love him or miss him; just about my day.. what I've done, where I've been etc. But that's my way of grieving, and dealing with the loss. These are all ideas, but only you know the best way to help yourself through it, admittedly sometimes it's easier to go it alone, because at the end of the day you're still number one. Your cousin would want you to be happy, and that's what you have to try and do, yes, it's very hard, but she wouldn't want you to be down all the time. You know in your heart you'll never ever forget her, but the best thing you can do is be happy, it's not an insult to her memory at all xxx

Pray.

My grandma from New York died. My mom and her two sisters did not take it so well. Everytime that My mom and Aunt go to New York to visit her grave they cry to let all of their feelings out. I have never cried for my deceased grandma because I find it hard to cry. Some people talk to the deceased person as if they are a ghost or up in heaven or still alive and can hear them. Try saying something like "Hi __________! Its me _________. I know that we didn't talk much but...".

My grandma from New York died. My mom and her two sisters did not take it so well. Everytime that My mom and Aunt go to New York to visit her grave they cry to let all of their feelings out. I have never cried for my deceased grandma because I find it hard to cry. Some people talk to the deceased person as if they are a ghost or up in heaven or still alive and can hear them. Try saying something like "Hi __________! Its me _________. I know that we didn't talk much but...".

I'm sorry about your loss :(
My grandma, who was my best friend in every sense, passed away about 3 years ago, so I understand your feelings.
I think if you're finding it hard to be around your family at this time, talk to your friends and ask them if you can all go and do something fun, like go to the beach, shopping, or out for a drink. But try not ignore your family, explain to them, and tell them you love them but you need your own time to breath and grieve.
Make sure you give them hugs and if you have siblings who are struggling, take their mind off it and invite them out for a fun activity.
I hope this helps in your time of sadness.

I totally know what you're talking about. My dad died almost 4 yeara ago and I really didn't know what to do. My friends helped me and that is how how I did it. I would not be here if i didn't have these amazing friends. Look for your beloved ones support. Talk about your feelings and don't hide them, cry, if you feel that is what you need. It is the best thing you can do.
Hope it helps you :)

Just be there for your family, and give yourself time to grieve. I lost my uncle in 2006 and my grandma in 2007, I still get upset over both, and have days when I have to cry over it. But what helps the most is thinking of the fun times you had with them. And talking to them, praying...

get a pet or two (its a reason to keep living because if u stop they die too)

I am terribly sorry for your loss. I lost my dad a little over a year and a half ago due to a massive heart attack. Losing a loved one is not an easy thing to go through. The thing you need to do the most right now is to stay strong for your family. If you believe in God, don't lose your faith because you need Him the most during times like these. God bless you and your family.

I've come to realize that it never seems to get better... My best friend of 15 years passed away recently... I wake up everyday and think of her, she creeps into my thoughts during the day, and before I go to sleep I think of her too. My life without her is so weird, we always talked about growing old together... I have found that although I do not have her in my life, there are other people around me who support me and I lean on. Of course it is nothing to say I've been there, because everyones emotional connection to a person is different. But it sucks, scream, cuss, cry, do what you need to do to get through this... the raw emotions will subside and only sneak attack you once in a while. It has been almost three months, I still mourn her loss and always will. But talking to her and visiting her gravesite helps me tremendously, although I feel stupid standing out there in a graveyard, but it helps. When I leave I feel like a weight has been lifted. Hope it helps, if not... I rambled and it helped me in this moment.

First of all I would like to say that I'm really sorry that this happened to you and your family. I do understand what you're going through. I lost my father around 6 years ago and my grandfather, who was everything in this world to me, only next to my mother, passed away 12 days ago. Both times I didn't cry...well at least not too much. Just can't seem to cry but that doesn't mean I'm coping with the situation well enough. There is not a single moment in my life that doesn't remind me of all the good times we had and the dreams and hopes we shared. I miss them terribly.
BUT such is life my dear. Someone once said to me..."Always be prepared to lose your loved ones". So dear, my advice to you would be, Be with the ones who need you the most right now. At least you still have them. They need a shoulder to cry on and so do you. If one relationship is lost, strengthen the bond that is still present. Live your life to the fullest and help your family to move on.
Also a very sad fact of life is no matter how many years in the future, the grief will still be there. But trust me it'll get better eventually. With time you'll get to realize that your beloved one is there with you all right, smiling from above and they want nothing but only the best for you. And so my dear let your emotions out, mourn and grief and cry and shout but know it from inside that there's nothing wrong with being happy.
Take care. I wish all the very best for you and your family. xxxxx

im so sorry for your loss. i completely understand what you're going through. iv found that if you talk to them, no matter where you are, it helps. tell them about your problems, tell them you miss them, tell them about your friends, tell them about the men in your life, tell them whats going on. it will help.

This is exactly how I feel right now. Like exactly.
My cousin also passed away, but it was 2 months ago. I can assure you, it is hard for the first bit, but it does get better. Im very sorry to hear about your loss and I send my condolences to you and your family. Even though you did not know her well, it is best to talk with family and share feelings with them. If you are bottling your feelings up inside, it is really not a good idea. You will feel way better to just let it out and cry. Life is may seem really hard at this point but, I know that it can get better in time. It may be stormy now, but it cant rain forever.