GirlsGuideTo | Question: I'm truly with a great guy, who...

I'm truly with a great guy, who is supporting me through nursing school and bought me a new car because I drive 80 miles one way to class and my truck left me on the side of the road one time too many. I love him! Truly do and not because he's supporting me, but because he is the one who makes me laugh and smile for no reason. But, how do I get past the trapped feeling of having to rely on him and the loss of my independence? I've never depended on anyone I supported my ex-husband for 6 years! How can I accept his help without fear without this failing feeling? It's starting to put a burden on my end of the relationship!

Comments

Posted by Mary Kate Dick on January 3, 2012 at 11:32 AM

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i agree with the above-commenter.... i think society tells us that we have to be independent and have our lives totally together all the time. but really, the truth is that we're not made to be alone! think about how much you probably enjoy doing something for someone else, to help them out. your BF probably loves feeling needed and like he can help you. as long as the relationship is healthy, and he isn't manipulating you by attaching strings or expectations to his gifts, go with it. you have a good thing!

Posted by Anonymous on December 29, 2011 at 4:44 PM

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Accept that you need help sometimes. Accept that what goes around comes around. 6 years? My principle is never get caught depending on him, but never be afraid to accept help.
Also, take a look at the relationship. My parents always help each other like that, and they've been happily married for over two decades...I mean really happily. So honestly look at the kind of relationship it is, and if its THAT kind of relationship, trust it, but always have your plan in motion...we all need help sometimes, especially if you're on your way somewhere in life.