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Question: My boyfriend and I have been together...

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Posted by Anonymous on March 16, 2012 at 9:44 AM

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half. First we were fighting because we were too close to each other. We hung out almost 24/7 and if we weren't hanging out, we were on the phone. I used to get annoyed when he posted little FB statuses about how much he loved me. I felt like it was going too fast.

A while later...Now I'm constantly fighting with him because we spend no time whatsoever with each other. He's always at his friend's house. He texts me, but that's not the same as in-person quality time. Now he has a job, but after he gets home from his job I sit around waiting for a phone call -- only to receive a text from his friend's house. I miss those FB statuses and feel left out when all my friends get one from their bf/gf.

I feel ignored and neglected. And I feel stupid for feeling that. I feel like all his friends think of me as a bitch because he's always saying, "I can't, she'll get mad at me," rather than, "I can't, I want to spend time with my lady." It's like he doesn't want to spend time with me.

Whenever I try to tell him how I feel about how he words things to his friends and how I feel like he's always ditching me, it turns into a big argument. I can't tell him how I feel without him saying, "I know blah blah blah," and walking all over my personal words. The least I ask for in the end is for an apology and things to change, but when he goes to apologize I feel like he's being cocky.

I really don't want to break up with him over something I feel can be worked out, but honestly don't know what the heck to do. Ya know? Any words of advice?

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  • Posted by Anonymous on July 16, 2012 at 10:00 AM
If asking for quality time is nagging, then ladies, we're all in trouble.
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  • Posted by Anonymous on March 22, 2012 at 12:46 PM
Give yourself a night or two a week where you don't contact him. Give him some time with his friends. Fair enough he spends a lot of time there now but probably because you nag at him to much.

If you cant get along with his friend that's you're problem. It's not your place to judge how his friends live their lives and I'm sure you've probably mentioned how much you don't like what his friend is like which can be hurtful so don't criticize his friends, he wont like it.
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  • Posted by Anonymous on March 16, 2012 at 7:48 PM
I'm sure he has been there since he texts me from his phone. I am a hundred percent sure. As much as I'd love to go hang out with him and his friend, I just don't get along with his friend because he's going no where with his life.

I
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I would let him cool off and do my own thing. If he misses you he'll let you know. I didn't think about the cheating part but it's definitely possible. Are you sure he's always at that friend's house? If you're not, try hanging out with the both of them when he supposedly goes to that friend's house instead of your's. I wouldn't try to hold onto the relationship or drag it out. If you do break up, you'll find love again!
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  • Posted by Faye Avery on March 16, 2012 at 9:56 AM
I had this exact same problem about 5 yeat ago. Bf was going round mates house and I barely saw him. He would work and get dropped off there. It wasn't until a couple of weeks after we split up I found out he had been cheating on me and using his mate as an excuse. I even went down to his friends house to find out what was going off and he lied to me. He went out one night and came back with a love bite. He said his mate did it but I didn't buy it for a second. That's when he started acting weird.

I tried really hard to find out what happened and to work it out bit never got through to him.
If he's that bothered about not seeing you and talking to you when you raise your concerns then he's never going to change and he's never going to want to work it out.
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