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Question: My boyfriend of 3 years and I...

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Posted by Anonymous on September 27, 2009 at 7:50 PM

My boyfriend of 3 years and I broke up about 3 months ago and I want him back. He's dating another girl but they're already having problems and she's already hid major things from him, lied to him and told him that she's not going to be there for him during a major family issue. He and I still hang out all the time (more than he hangs out with her) and his hugs are still a little too long and he still holds my hand and cuddles with me, and he promised he would try again if it didnt work with her. Any suggestions on how I can get him to see she's not good for him and it's NOT working and to get him to come back?

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I really feel like you can be a good friend to someone and not do all the things that his girlfriend is supposed to do. Be there for him in the midst of his family crisis...sure....but all that hugging and holding hands and what has got to go.....I do realize that some women are inconsiderate and need to have a reality check because they can be selfish but right now he is getting the best of both worlds....he has you for support and comfort but he's with someone else. he's not going to stop seeing her....make him make a decision you or her....be his friend not his chick on the side and that doesn't just mean sleeping with him that means the girl that takes up his girlfriends slack...I have been through it and after all was said and done I still ended up getting hurt in the long run because I gave him all the attention and support that he needed and in the end he stayed in the relationship that he was in....so be careful and guard your heart. put your foot down and tell him how you feel...if he really loves you then he will make the right decision. set some guidelines as to what you will and won't do and watch the results....he will appreciate you more and you won't be disrespecting the other girl in the long run....be a lady about the situation.....Just think if you were her would you want him to be hugged up with another female....i'm pretty sure you wouldn't........
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  • Posted by Nadine Amr on September 29, 2009 at 12:06 PM
look if u truley love him u must go and talk to him,tell him how u truely feels and from what u said i say that he feels the same!gd luck and go girl!go win him back :D
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  • Posted by Anonymous on September 29, 2009 at 2:21 AM
this kinda reminds me of the Taylor Swift song "You Belong With Me"
if you havent heard it go to http://www.lyricsmania.com/lyrics/taylor_swift_lyrics_9028/fearless_lyrics_86091/you_belong_with_me_lyrics_846605.html read the lyrics while its playing its such a good song.
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  • Posted by Anonymous on September 28, 2009 at 11:28 PM
thanks ladies! i haven't slept with him since before we broke up and i don't intend to until we're together again, if it happens. he is my best friend now too, and as much as i don't want to be like omg just break up with her, i know i can't force it. i've been there for him this entire time, and i have no intention to stop. i just HATE seeing people i care about being hurt or mistreated. the other day he said something like, "she doesn't know my story the way you do". so i'm trying to be hopeful but not like... overly in case nothing happens. thanks again for your comments, and thank you Morgan, you're sweet too! hope things continue to go well for you and Steven! :)
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  • Posted by Anonymous on September 28, 2009 at 6:07 PM
Move on...
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I agree with the above post.
Similar thing happened to me. Steven and I weren't dating at the time but we both knew we liked each other - well he got a girlfriend and instead of acting all hurt and refusing to talk to him. I stuck by him and thought friendship was better than nothing at all. So...for about a month I listened to their problems gave helpful advice and just waited. Then she decided that she wanted to get back with her baby's dad and broke it off with him. Then not too long after that we realized that we LOVED each other and we weren't gonna lose each other again like that. And we'e been together ever since (a little over a year now) So I would definitely say just continue to be with him and DO NOT sleep with him! He has a girlfriend. Once he realizes that she's not the one but that you are the one that TRULY cares - he'll want to come back and work it out. And when ya'll do get back together - talk about why ya'll broke up before. Also just because ya'll have problems doesn't mean ya'll are not meant to be and breaking up isn't going to fix them. So really try to talk with each other and work things out once ya'll are back together! =)

Everything will work out you'll see! You're a sweet person - he'll see that. but guys aren't the smartest things ever when it comes to relationship stuff - so it may not happen overnight...but it will! =)
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  • Posted by Anonymous on September 28, 2009 at 2:34 AM
dont sleep with him while he's with this girl coz he will think he can have his cake & eat it.If she isnt going to be there for him with his family problem then u be there as a friend then hopefully he will see that even though you broke up your still there for him emotionaly & decide to give it another go{if you do get back together talk about the problems you had that made you split up & sort them out}good luck!
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